Happy Father's Day.
Sarah posted a good comment on my post about raising girls to be strong. She said: "In certain ways I think that the "ideal" for men is much more restrictive than the ones for females. We as women are free to choose between several different "ideals" that makes it both freeing and more difficult."
She has a good point, and one that I was reminded of today at church.
Yet another study on how fathers are to be "strong" and "courageous."
Be a good example. Protect your family. Don't exasperate your kids. Discipline your kids. So it goes . . .
In other words: Fathers: be MEN!
What does that really mean? "I am Manly!"
Don't lose your "Man Card."
Facebook recommend I join a "Real Men" type group yesterday, apparently because I'm a man. What was it? Guns and degrading pictures of women. Yeah, that's us. Weapons and lusting over women.
By "Manly" do we mean full of testosterone? I think that's the end of the definition as far as society goes.
What does testosterone do?
Obviously it promotes muscle growth and changes in your body, but it also changes your thinking.
Testosterone increases motivation, competitiveness, stamina, sexual arousal, risk taking behavior, aggression, and "mating behavior." (from Wikipedia.)
So a "Man" is someone with high testosterone levels? That sounds more like a teenage boy to me.
Testosterone begins to drop as men grow older -- you know, like when they become FATHERS.
If they don't, statistically you have issues:
"We examine the relationship of testosterone to tendencies to marry and divorce, and to the quality of marriage, of a large representative sample of men. The analysis shows that men producing more testosterone are less likely to marry and more likely to divorce. Once married they are more likely to leave home because of troubled marital relations, extramarital sex, hitting or throwing things at their spouses, and experiencing a lower quality of marital interaction. Sociological models that might be informed by this finding are examined, and its implications for subsequent research are discussed.
- Copyright © 1993 The University of North Carolina Press"
Yeah, let's celebrate that. (Not.)
I would rather celebrate those men who have matured past adolescence and learned to do well in the world regardless of their hormonal level. Let's celebrate men who respect their wives, children, and honestly everyone who has less testosterone.
Let's (as a society) actually honor and hold up the men who aren't defined by the chemicals in their system. Let's redefine "Manly" as those who have moved beyond their teenage habits. Let's set that example for our sons and daughters.
So, here's my "Manly" art work that I enjoyed doing because I love my family.
Happy Father's day!
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