Love, Respect, and Trust: A new perspective on relationships

Traditionally, a lot of emphasis has been placed on the need for trust in a relationship. Recently, a lot of people are evaluating their relationships in terms of love or respect. I believe that you cannot love without respect, but you can love without trust.

When determining such an important question in our lives, who better for us to look to than the example of Jesus Christ? While the Sunday-school version of Jesus appears to be an all-patient, all-trusting gentleman, a closer look at his relationships reveals a whole different story.

Did Jesus really trust his disciples?

              At the last supper, Jesus introduced the idea that the disciples weren’t trustworthy.  “I tell you the truth, one of you is going to betray me.” (John 13:21). Even though Jesus answered the question of who he was speaking about, attention was shifted to Peter, who most vehemently denied ever betraying Jesus. Jesus’ answer was firm: Even Peter would betray Jesus.
              Yet in Jesus’ distrust of his disciples – even knowing without a doubt that they would betray him – Jesus still had loving, healthy relationships. The disciples had the purest example of love demonstrated that very night, with Jesus washing the disciples’ feet.

“Now that I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you” (John 13:14).

              How is it possible to have a relationship of any sort without trust? Jesus demonstrates respect to his disciples. In Luke 22, right in the middle of the discussion on betrayal, Jesus tells them: “And I confer on you a kingdom, just as my Father conferred one on me, so that you may eat and drink at my table in my kingdom and sit on thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel” (22:29,30). Even though the disciples aren’t trustworthy, Jesus promises them a place of honor and respect in his kingdom.

It turns out the Bible has a lot to say about trusting in anyone other than God:

•  “But man, despite his riches, does not endure; he is like the beasts that perish. This is the fate of those who trust in themselves, and of their followers, who approve their sayings.” (Ps. 49:13)
• “It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man.  It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in princes.” (Ps. 118:8,9)
•  “Beware of your friends; do not trust your brothers. For every brother is a deceiver, and every friend a slanderer.” (Jer. 9:4)
•  “Your brothers, your own family— even they have betrayed you; they have raised a loud cry against you. Do not trust them, though they speak well of you.” (Jer. 12:6)
•  ”Do not trust a neighbor; put no confidence in a friend. Even with her who lies in your embrace be careful of your words.” (Michah 7:5)
• “He who trusts in himself is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom is kept safe.” (Prov. 28:26)
• “Stop trusting in man, who has but a breath in his nostrils. Of what account is he?” (Isa. 2:22)
• “This is what the LORD says: “Cursed is the one who trusts in man . . .” (Jer. 17:5)

  On the other hand, the Bible is a lot more positive about respecting others:

• “Give everyone what you owe him: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor.” (Rom. 13:7)
• “However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.” (Eph. 5:33)
• “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect . . .” (1 Pet. 3:7)
• “Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ.” (Eph. 6:5)
• “And masters, treat your slaves in the same way.” (Eph. 6:9)
• “Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business and to work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.” (1 Thes. 4:12)
• “Now we ask you, brothers, to respect those who work hard among you, who are over you in the Lord and who admonish you.” (1 Thes. 5:12)
• “Deacons, likewise, are to be men worthy of respect . . .” (1 Tim. 3:8)
• “In the same way, their wives are to be women worthy of respect . . .” (1 Tim. 3:11)
• “Show proper respect to everyone: Love the brotherhood of believers, fear God, honor the king.” (1 Pet. 17)
• “Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.” (1 Pet. 3:15)

       As a Pastor, I prefer that people don’t trust me as a leader. I need to be a man worthy of respect, and the office of pastor warrants respect and honor, but I want people to put their trust in God, not me. I want people to search the scriptures for themselves, and not simply trust my interpretation of it.
       I have had many good, strong, healthy relationships with people I do not trust. The strongest relationships are built upon respecting them for who God made them to be, and honoring them for being made in the image of God.

For more information, download the sermon:
Sermon on Respect and Trust

Turning Modern Church Upside-down

Ephesians 4:11-13

 “It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, to prepare God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.”

The pastor’s job is not a mystery.

Although not much is said about the position of Pastor directly in the Bible, what is said is clear. It does not require a supernatural experience to find the “vision” God has for the church, and it is not about advancing your own burdens, or gaining influence. It does not change from year to year. It is simply to build up the body of Christ to full maturity by equipping God’s people for service!

The goal is maturity for every believer. The process is plain: equip them to serve God. The experience gained from serving God will accomplish the rest.
Watch the simple process laid out here:

1. Equip and prepare God’s people for works of service.
The Greek word is katartismos, which means “complete furnishing, equipping.” The pastor’s job is to provide the equipment (teaching, training, resources, and authority) needed for the individuals in the church to serve God.

2. The service that comes from the individual people will build up the whole body of Christ.
I’m not talking church growth in numbers here, but the healing and unity of the people currently in the church. As the pastor equips the individuals to service, and gives them room to serve, make mistakes, and learn, the people within the church begin to have a stronger walk with God.

3. As the whole church is grows stronger, people begin to find unity and maturity in their service.
The idea is common-sense. It’s easy to criticize someone when you are just watching. When you actually try to do things yourself you gain a while new respect for the people who are accomplishing things. As the individuals gain respect for the work others are doing, it brings us to unity, even when we disagree, and it brings us to maturity in Christ, as we put into practice what Jesus taught.

4. The maturity of the believer leads us to the full measure of Christ.
In Gal. 4, Paul says that the immature believer is still treated as a slave, under the guardianship of the law. Yet a mature believer is set free from the law, like a young adult is set free from the guardians of their childhood. With that “spiritual adulthood” comes the inheritance planned for us. We cannot receive the fullness of what Christ has for us until we mature.

Notice that without the proper equipping of the individuals to ministry, nothing happens. Yet once the individual is equipped to minister, and they take advantage of that opportunity, amazing things happen naturally! Each individual in the church should be actively equipped for some sort of ministry – that makes every Christian a minister!

Why another church?

One of the things I struggled with when I first considered becoming a pastor was “Why do we need another church?”

What’s wrong with the other churches out there? It seems to me that instead of having a whole bunch of little, struggling churches, that it would make more sense to join together and support the churches that are already established.

Then I realized that different churches have different purposes.

Some churches are aimed at new believers. They are designed for a specific group. Their church policies, leadership, worship and teaching styles are all designed to protect and nurture “Baby Christians.”  Some churches are aimed at specific sections of society, like homeless missions, or the military. Some are for older people, some for young families, and some for singles.

Like businesses, a church can be effective when it takes care of the people that are drawn to it, and provides for a “niche” market.

Sometimes we don’t get to pick who our church will draw, but we have to adjust to the needs of the people who are there, not try to force a specific niche on our church. There will be certain types of people who will feel comfortable with the church, and they will draw others like them.

Creekside’s current “niche” is aimed at people who used to go to church, but quit, for some reason or another. Maybe they got disillusioned about the mistakes that church leaders make. Maybe they got frustrated with the material they were being taught, and got bored. Maybe they wanted to do more with what they’ve been taught, but were limited by the structure of the church they were in. I’ve experienced all of these myself.

In fact, there was a time when I didn’t attend church regularly. It didn’t mean that I was rebelling against God, it’s just that I couldn’t find a church that was providing what I needed. After a while, I got tired of looking. I still had fellowship with other Christians, I still studied the Bible, I still had a walk with God, but I just couldn’t find a church to plug into.

Maybe that’s why we’re drawing others like me. I understand what it is to be frustrated with church. I’ve tried to set “policy” to avoid some of the pitfalls that frustrated me. As others are coming to church who also understand that frustration, it creates an environment of understanding. You won’t be judged as a
“Bad Christian” because you haven’t been to church in a while. We understand that happens!

That’s why our church is “different.” Not that other churches are doing it wrong — they are serving a need, and serving it well, in most cases. But we have a specific group that we’re serving, and that group has specific needs.

In that sense, another church is a good thing!

A Little History . . .

First, a little history of where I come from, and what I’ve done.

In high school, my plan was to be a Civil Engineer. That’s how I think, and how I learn. My Dad is an engineer, and he taught me a pragmatic approach to life. Things have causes and effects. I want to look for effective methods of accomplishing what I’m after. I bring that same attitude to my relationship with God, and being an active part of growing the kingdom of Heaven. After all, a kingdom is grown bases on principles and design, right? I believe that God has a plan that’s based on cause and effect, and I want to work within that plan.
My career as an engineer was cut short just as I was leaving High School. Not through lack of perseverance, or not being qualified, but by an interruption by God. Instead, I started studying to be a pastor. I figured that training to be a pastor would serve me well whatever I became, whether youth leader, counsellor, associate pastor, missionary, etc. However, there was one area I didn’t consider, and that is, of course, exactly where God put me. After attending a couple of Bible colleges (Pacific Bible College in Medford, and Calvary Chapel Bible College in Murietta, CA), and serving as an intern for a local church (Bear Creek Church under Pastor Dale Meador), God moved me into evangelism.
Of all the things I considered, evangelism was not one of them. I thought I simply didn’t have the right personality for that. I thought of evangelists as charisma-filled, exuberant people, and that is not me. I’m mellow, and somewhat boring in person. (Maybe I’m boring on blogs, too, but we’ll hope for the best, right?)
I ended up spending 10 years working as the director for “Pass the Word.” It doesn’t exist at the moment, but is in the process of being rebooted through Creekside. More on that later.
The idea behind Pass the Word was to distribute New Testament Bibles in ways and in areas that the Gideons were unable to. Sort of a “Next Generation Gideons,” to fill the gaps that they couldn’t. Nothing against the Gideons, they do amazing work. But any organization has to set boundaries, and we worked in an area that they didn’t.
I learned more in the first 6 months of witnessing than I had learned in Bible College, interning, and church my whole life. It gave me a whole different perspective of what the Kingdom of God is about. I spent the next 10 years equipping people to witness to others, whether through providing Bibles, training, prayer, support, and encouragement.
When it was time, God catapulted me into being a pastor, 3 years ago. I’ll talk about the details some other time, I’m sure. But now, as I’m leading the church, my time as a street evangelist has influenced me to do things completely different than what I was taught at Bible college, and even as an intern. Some of the ideas are the same, but the way I am applying them are completely new.
So, what I am essentially doing is to “experiment” with a different paradigm for church for the next generation. It may work, it may not. We’ve had some successes, and made some mistakes. This blog is essentially a record of that experiment, so that others can see, learn from, and contribute to the attempt.
If you are interested in a new design for church, this is a blog for you!
If you think that this whole idea is going to explode in my face, and you’re the sort who loves watching a train wreck, this is for you, too! Few things motivate me more that people telling me “it can’t be done!”
-Travis

Welcome to the Creekside Web Log!

This is the beginning of my web log for Creekside Christian Center.

I’m been meaning to record and document all of the things that have been happening at Creekside, for future use. I figured if I was just writing to myself, I would have no motivation to actually write it. Also, I thought that maybe there were people out there who also wanted to know what was going on, and so here’s my chance to keep a log, and to make it available to any who are interested!
Stay tuned, or subscribe, or bookmark, or whatever it is you do to find your way back here for more updates!

A Few Ground Rules

Okay, since I’m not being anonymous, and many out there are, if you want to participate in this blog, through comments, links, whatever, these are the ground rules.

• I reserve the right to change my mind.
• Believe it or not, I do learn new things, and get new perspectives on situations. Comments may actually change my mind! Things that I write later may contradicts things I write now. Instead of going back and editing everything, I choose to leave the original, so that I can track my thoughts, and see where I have grown and learned new things. That includes my right to change these rules. I figure that if I have to wait and write until I won’t change my mind, I’ll never write!
• Please don’t try to tell me what I believe.
• One of the reasons I have avoided discussing religion and theology on the internet is the tendency to label one another, and the assume that person now holds to all the beliefs that a typical Christian/Evangelical/Pentecostal/Baptist/Calvary Chapel/etc. is believed to hold.
• Few things are as frustrating as being argued with over something that I won’t defend.
• You know where to find me, and my posts keep that in mind, please give me the same respect.
• For things I post, I can be found on Sunday mornings at church to answer for them. You can be anybody from who knows where. I’m willing to talk face-to-face about what I say. (In fact I would welcome the opportunity.) Please return the respect by posting only what you would be willing to find me and say to me in church.
• I don’t have to explain everything.
• I don’t owe a full explanation to you about my private life, thoughts, or experiences. I’m here to share thoughts and ideas. When it comes to theology and scripture, I am willing to share the source material found in the Bible, but I’m not out to “Prove” everything written here. It’s a place to share and stimulate, not to convince. That’s a boundary that I choose to set.
• Keep it respectful.
• Sometimes I will probably need to be reminded of this. There’s a big difference between questioning the policies, procedures, and polity of other churches, and attacking the church or pastor itself. The ideas are fair game. The reasoning behind such ideas are fair game. However, different churches are serving different needs, and they are trying to have a positive effect on the Lord’s kingdom. They deserve respect for that.
• Any disrespectful comment will be removed.

For now, that’s about it. I’m sure other ground rules will need to be added later, as I learn more about this blog world, but that’s enought to get started on!
That said, please comment and feedback, regardless of your denomination, religion, or background!
-Travis